May contain Rants

Face to Face

17/10/201330/04/2017 FinLeave a comment

Face to face

That first time

Hands barely touching

Fingers tips tingled at

Your slightest movement

Then THAT embrace

Eyes so blue

I found myself

Consciously fixed by your gaze

Not wanting to look away

Unlike I normal do

I don’t do the eye connect thing

But you

The first time I looked into your eyes

You transposed me into the deepest part of your soul

Into a vision of such beauty

A beauty I will never witness again

Or would want to.

Then there were you lips

The fullness of your pout

Exciting

Enticing

Then there was THAT kiss

That was five years ago

And now your touch still makes my fingertips tingle

And your kisses still entice me

But

Still I don’t do the eye contact thing

With anyone but you.

May contain Rants

Time and Distance

13/10/201326/08/2015 Fin2 Comments

I watched you unpack

Your suitcase

I missed you I said

You stopped, smiled

Turned and kissed me on the cheek

And said I’ve missed you too

But I was only gone four days

The house was quiet without you

I said

Empty, tidy but colder

But in a funny way

I missed your mess

I’m glad your home

You turned wrapped

your hand in mine

Until you squeezed it tightly

And said I’m glad I’m home too

But I was only in Amsterdam

My minds been working overtime

Without you here to calm it

I said

You’ve been on my mind constantly

You let go of my hand and hugged me

and said I thought of nothing but you too

But I told you it was only four days away in Amsterdam

I know I said its seems nothing

when you say like that

But in seconds it sounds so much worst

In my mind

You were gone for

345600 seconds

and seemed so far away

495 Kilometres away to be exact!

I told you my mind’s been

working over time

But I missed you

At the centre of my universe

08/10/201320/04/2017 Fin2 Comments

at the centre of my universe

are two women

one that gave me life

and other one who makes life complete.

May contain Rants

Look in the mirror and smile

07/10/201319/04/2017 FinLeave a comment

Sometimes I look in the mirror and check the make up

Not cosmetically,

But the physiological make up that makes me

Sometimes I look and see the confidence

The strength with every new line that appears

But sometimes (rarely now)

I see a child’s image reflect back at me

The eight years old (me)

Weak, timid, no voice and a million fears created

by the violent noises that surrounded me

From my Jekyll and Hyde father

Memories that sometimes are so clear,

I am back there, hiding behind the sofa as a battle is fought

In the living room

It’s a noise that never leaves you

I hate violent noise

Angry voices still now

I shun those’s who take me back to hear this noise

these days I fight for the underdog, the supressed , those who feel like I felt

when mother’s shout and scream at their child

I offer a reassuring smile

to comfort to send a message not all adults scream and shout

some of us smile

so maybe when they’re grown they won’t remember

the violent noise that came from their mother mouth

maybe just maybe they will remember

the stranger that gave them that reassuring smile

and when they are grown maybe they will look in the mirror

And see an image a of smiling face starring back at them

May contain Rants

From Morning until dusk

06/10/201330/04/2017 FinLeave a comment

The morning is for us

From that first kiss that awakes

Me from my dreams about you

To smiling at you as lying next to me

The mid-morning and afternoons are full of thoughts of you

Mid-morning smoke breaks and texts from you

To counting down the hours til you get home

Lunchtime chats that end with I love you

The evening is always spent will you?

Catching up on the day’s events we’ve both been through

Listening to music, watching TV, me writing poetry and you bringing me tea

Evening full of laughter, and chatter

The dusk is for us

Filled with passion and the exquisite touch of you

Alone time, our time

And kisses we share to send us to our slumber

And as we lie face to face we both say goodnight

May contain Rants

Shoes

06/10/201306/10/2013 FinLeave a comment

We are like two pairs of shoes

You and I

Those that walk in unison

That have travelled down roads

Some would find it hard to endure

Down the same path

We walk in unison

Same pace, side by side

Heading for

Our dream

Our home

Our haven

We are shoes that dance when no one is around

We dance to the same song you and I

Slowly

Rhythmically

Always in time

So we never to step on each other’s feet!

But sometimes we avoid other people’s shoes

Not to avoid walking in them- no

But because other peoples shoes have a tendency

Of treading on your toes

And kicking you in the shins

And stomping on you when you’re down

But for some

We are shoes that will walk a thousand miles

To carry them home

Because we care enough

About the one’s we love

When times get hard

And they are heavy with burden and

Can no longer walk

We will carry them home

And at night when the moon has risen in the sky

Our shoes they sit side by side

Sharing the darkness of the night

Until it is morning and again they walk in unison

May contain Rants

One of those days

04/10/201321/06/2017 FinLeave a comment

If today was a texture it would be course wool

The kind that makes you itch as it touches your skin

If today was a colour it would grey

The kind of colour of breeze blocks that they use to build prison walls

If today was an emotion it would sorrow

The kind of emotion you know you want to cry

But don’t cos you’re afraid you’ll never stop

If today was a sense it be summed up in a look

The kind of look that disengages you from looking towards the light

If today was a time it would be ten to two

Kind of a time you need time to yourself

But know in reality that’s it’s not going happen until after five

It on days like these that you have to get through

For you never know tomorrow might be

yellow in colour and have the texture of silk

May contain Rants

Winter sands

02/10/201320/04/2017 FinLeave a comment

As autumn arrives

And winter is not far behind

The beach becomes a void

Of the throngs of families

Who came in their droves

To frolic and dance on the vast yellow shores

That now lie deserted, abandoned

No more castles will be built until the spring

Yet there is beauty in these unspoilt sands

That makes us walk for miles until we reach the beaches end

And we come to the Bay

Desolate

The waves crash harder against the rocks on the Bay

As we wrap up in thick winter coats to keep the winds from biting

As the tides drive the sea further than it has flowed all year

And the winter sand stings

Rock pools drown in the ebbing tides

And boats are neatly moored in the quayside

And apart from the gulls cry,hungry for food

That’s no longer there to steal

The silence is overwhelming

The greyness of the skies blend into the greyness of the ocean

The shore has been reclaimed

And ours are the only foot prints to be seen along the shore

This is the time I love to go beach walking with you

May contain Rants

The waiting Room

01/10/201320/04/2017 Fin4 Comments

People silently sitting

Some sit with hands fidgeting

And knees twitching

Nervous tension

Sat in neat orderly lines and rows

Waiting, clock watching

Tick tock tick tock

They sit with fear etched on their faces

There’s a sense of premature sadness that fills the air

Waiting, clock watching

Tick tock, tick tock

Empathic smiles shared between strangers

In corridors and rooms with sterile coloured walls

With magazines on tables 3 months out of date

and discarded styrofoam cups

Soft muzak plays to soothe the patients as they wait to learn their fate

Waiting, clock watching

Tick tock, tick tock

For their name to be called

For their futures to be decided

Whether it is allowed to continue as it was before

But for those who are told the bad news (no one wants the bad news)

They leave the doctor’s office

With their world crashing down

Tumbling around their feet

Whilst those left sit patiently

Smile with empathic grins

All thinking the same thought

There but for the grace of God (go I)

But still they sit

Waiting, clock watching

Tick tock, tick tock

For their name to be called out