she is at her grandfather’s house
he is pulling funny facing trying to make her laugh,
make her smile
she’s just a few months over one
the girl in lace topped cotton socks
and highly polished shoes
her whole life before her
her future unknown
she didn’t know then
how she would learn to run and hide
when ever she heard violent noise
how she felt safe in her mother’s arms
how they forge bond so tight it would never be broken
because of the things they’d go through
how she didn’t like to go to school
because the bullies would be waiting
how the teachers would say she was stupid
how her mother would fight with them and tell her
she was bright.
little did she know that demons would try to become her friends
how they’d like to play with her mind
how their stay would become unwelcome
how she grow in strength and stature
how her heart would be filled with love for others
she’d sometimes forget to love herself
she didn’t know it then that the husband and
2.4 children would never occur
that she grow up being attracted to girls
that she would have her heart broken so many times ,
but she’d also break a few on her journey too.
this little girl didn’t know it back then that her mother would become ill
so weak, have to deal with so so much pain
lose her independence
that doctors would instruct to say her goodbyes to her
on more than one occasion
little did she know she would turn her back on G_d
because her question
“Why do you put my mother through so much pain,
what did she do to you that was so wrong?” would never be answered
that this little girl would one day solely care for her mother day by day
would dress, shower and unconditionally love her .
how she would lose and mourn love ones , forgive love ones and find new love ones
but I know one thing for sure that little girl is still smiling
even though sometimes have been difficult for her
I know because that little girl me.
©Copyright 2013 by June Bolland.
All rights reserved.