May contain Rants

Tis The Season To Be Jolly………..

I have felt a little off centre recently , not feeling  quiet right.Which trust me, is not good!!! It only needs a small seed of doubt to be planted in my head  and lo and behold I find  myself way up high, sitting in the tree of Gloom! 

Now I don’t know if  I can actually trace it back and find the source of this feeling of “Woe is me”. I think its combination of factors

1/ See the previous post “Short and Sweet” I think the conversations I had with certain individuals in the previous week really pissed me off.  It hasn’t  helped my mood that’s for sure.

2/ My mum who I am a caregiver to, is not so good at the moment , which is a real worry and I feel useless because of it! I’M SURE THIS IS GOING TO BE A FUTURE BLOG!!!!

3/ Now  November has just been the most depressing of month’s and I seem to have spent it surrounded by negativity . Maybe I’M SUFFERING FROM S.A.D ! I don’t know if it’s because the nights are drawing in so quickly and winter is fastly upon us. But I love winter (Well any excuse to wear a hat)!

and finally……

4/Christmas is creeping up way too fast.

Now this is the time my mood definitely hits  a low, and I think its all to do with reflecting on past year’s and past memories, and of people gone. However feeling like this, this year seems to be odd , because all in all it ain’t been too bad.

Seems that the moment  the fat bloke with the white beard puts on that Red coat and utters those three words” HO”, “HO”,
” HO” I seem to go “Woe”,”Woe”, “Woe”! Its not that I put myself under any extra pressure either by buying gifts for the sake of it.
I buy the girlfriend and my mum gift’s and that’s it. I don’t even send cards, I give to Charity instead. So I don’t expect Christmas to live up to the hype. But you can be guaranteed come December First my ‘Holiday depression’ will start.  I will however make an effort on the actual day, I won’t ruin it for other people. So trying to keep happy and calm! How long it will last is anyone’s guess. Anyway off to practice my new mantra before Saturday “It wont be long before the 26th” ,”It wont be long before the 26th” ,”It wont be long before the 26th” , 

Anyway Tatty Bye For Now

Finnx    

May contain Rants

Finally………

Howdy, and welcome to my blog. Yes finally after months of should I, shouldn’t I , I’ve managed to engage brain and index finger to create this blog.
Anyway why I am blogging now?…. erm good question ….. I have no idea , apart from back in 2009 I had a sort of Epiphany….. my mum was very ill and I had to take a forced 15 months career break and enforced period of confinement of sorts and I suddenly realised , bloody hell June you’re a carer, which scared me to half to death ,it had never entered my head before that I had been bestowed this ‘title’ and it made me take a serious look at my life and realised I stopped doing things I had enjoyed doing … writing, photography, and I had been learning BSL, which I stopped . Anyway I realised I could still do these thing’s and continue to be carer, I didn’t have to be stuck in a rut. So here I am back writing and I have enrolled and am currently study BSL Level 2 and I am in the process of dusting off the camera.
Hopefully you’ll come back for more ….. because that’s when this blog really gets going and the fun starts ,oh and I may have the odd rant or two.
June/ Finn x